When I was about to leave home for graduate school, my dad and I talked about living arrangements. I told him about the dorm apartments for graduate students and that I had requested a two-bedroom to share with a roommate. My dad suggested that I change that request to a one-bedroom for myself alone because I don’t get along with other people very well. Thanks a lot, Dad!! I went off to school, met a lot of cool people, then ended up alienating myself from all of them, including my roommate. The next year I had a studio apartment to myself.
I still run into problems with “getting along” with people. I know that it is me, because I am the only common denominator, but I don’t know what it is that I do exactly. I am hot-headed and passionate. I don’t think before I speak a lot of the time. But when I don’t speak, then I am perceived as stubborn, or angry, or snobbish. It makes people nervous if I don’t say anything. I know that I do not have a “poker face” and my feelings always come through with my facial expression. But even in online conference rooms, where nobody sees me since I abhor web cams, I have been told that people get nervous when I stay silent. But I open my mouth and I get reactions that I don’t expect.
I think that is par for the course for people with ADHD. I bought a book supposedly about the social cues that people with ADHD miss. I say supposedly because I have yet to make it past the first chapter. Short attention span. Bad thing. [sigh]