I am medication free now. I made it through Effexor withdrawal. No more splitting headaches. No more sudden nausea. No more making myself seasick by turning my head too fast. I even survived a 49-hour cross country road trip without getting carsick. And I’m back to my constipated self. But I cry at the drop… Continue reading An Unmedicated State
Category: Clinical Depression
Stoic Poet
I want to stop the tearsTurn off the water spoutWish I could reach into my chestand rip my heart right outMy bane, such painit’s driving me insaneSomeone whack me with a caneand release me from the strainI don’t want to cry anymoreI am drowning deep within my coreMuscles are tight and soreLife is too much… Continue reading Stoic Poet
Another day, another year
Happy Birthday to Me.Happy Birthday to Me.After 40 years of agony,I want to be free. Where is my serenity?I live in a seaawash with paranoia.Is there any hope for me? Depression is killing me,not physically, but spiritually.Constantly seeking answersis wearing badly on me. Happy Birthday to me.Happy Birthday to me.In my world of confusion,I want… Continue reading Another day, another year
Residual
See this pill?Just look, little girl.Do not crush or chew.Simply swallowand peace comes to you. It will let you sleep.It will let you dream.It will dry away your tears.It will answer all your prayers. Eyes close down.Brain remains in gear.Can’t find the stairs,but gotta get over there.What always remainsis fear.
Am I depressed?
Okay, how do you tell the difference between depression due to chemical imbalances of the brain versus depression due to your situation in life? Hell if I know. So I increased my meds like my shrink suggested to do. At the same time, my boyfriend’s mother has become even more annoying and intrusive. I went… Continue reading Am I depressed?
Are you depressed?
Your Depression Level: 48% You seem to have mild depression. A lot of people fall into your range, and it’s quite possible you don’t need treatment. If you’ve been feeling this way for a while, you may want to seek help. Are You Depressed? Mild depression … guess it’s a good thing that my medication… Continue reading Are you depressed?
Hooked on a feeling
I apologize for not posting in awhile. I’ve been in an awful funk lately, letting people and circumstances get to me. Been wallowing in a private pity party, yet again. I’ve been taking my meds and seeing my therapist like I’m supposed to be doing, just as prescribed. Really can’t blame treatment for this one.… Continue reading Hooked on a feeling
Depression as a mental illness
I bet you know somebody that whenever her name comes up in conversation, someone will undoubtedly say, “She’s off in her own little world.” Since being off in “your own little world” implies not being in this one, the “real” one, does that not suggest being out of touch with reality? Isn’t being out of… Continue reading Depression as a mental illness
Staring at the future
I went into psychiatry thinking that my own experiences as a psychiatric patient would be helpful. I thought that my experience would help me understand my patients better. I would be able to empathize with them. Maybe I identified too much with them. Maybe it turned out to be a detriment. I think about going… Continue reading Staring at the future
What’s it feel like?
You know what I think is the absolute worst feeling in the world? Complete and utter loss of control. That sense of helplessness. Feeling like there is nothing you can do to change anything.