Categories
Clinical Depression

Hooked on a feeling

I apologize for not posting in awhile. I’ve been in an awful funk lately, letting people and circumstances get to me. Been wallowing in a private pity party, yet again.

I’ve been taking my meds and seeing my therapist like I’m supposed to be doing, just as prescribed. Really can’t blame treatment for this one.

Clinical depression is not just a state of mind, it is an entire lifestyle. Even though the medications help lift my mood and focus my mind, I still have to break a lifetime of bad habits. I have to learn how to deal with things in a positive manner. Pessimism must be converted to optimism. Paranoia must be kept at bay. Feelings have to be shared, not bottled up inside. The body must stay active.

Anybody got a pill for that?

Categories
Dreams

Dreams

Dream interpretation fascinates me. It seems very subjective to me though. What can be more personal than your dreams? I offer up only the really weird ones, or the very obvious ones, in therapy. There are still some things that I just cannot say to anybody, even my therapist.

The other night I had the strange experience, strange for me at least, of talking in my sleep. TWICE! Both times I was very angry in the dream and I woke up yelling something that was not very nice. The first time was around midnight, and my boyfriend heard me from downstairs in the family room. He even came upstairs to find out what was wrong. The second time was around 5 am. My boyfriend very gently called out my name to wake me up so that I would stop dreaming about the “mother-f***ing a**hole” that I was yelling at.

Obviously, I have some anger issues.